STS: Step Back, JACK!

Posted by Mrs Zeee on 04/25/2009

People in general make me uncomfortable when they infringe on my personal space. Here are 6 personal space issues I hold sacred:

1) If you know me well, you know one thing: I DON’T LIKE POP-IN COMPANY. Listen, I’d love to have you over for a visit but just call first so that I am not on the couch in my REM Tshirt with a mouthful of B&J (the ice cream, folks). When the baby naps, my quiet time is MINE so please do not enter without forewarning.

2)Don’t HOVER over my lunch– I work in a cubicle, not a fancy office so it is not your place to stand over me while I am eating or worse, reach out to help yourself —- when is the last time you washed those hands and why do you think it’s okay to touch my food?

3) UPSTAIRS IS FOR NOT FOR GUESTS When you come by my home to visit, please help yourself to anything on the main floor. But DO NOT help yourself to my second level unless I invite you upstairs for some reason. Sometimes I leave the bed un-made and the diaper pail full and I don’t like to air my dirty laundry, literally.

4) What’s wrong with a hand shake? Why are there certain people that feel like they have to kiss you every time they see you? Close family or girlfriends are one thing, (I myself prefer the air kiss) but everyone else needs to step back and settle for a wave or a hand shake (at which point I’ll load up on Purell).

5) The line will not move any faster if you crowd my space. What is it with people who literally stand in line with their shopping carts up your butt? I feel I’ve said enough on this subject.

6) This is a no-hacking zone so please do not hack up a lung, fur ball, snot rocket or any other throat-nasties in my presence. If you must do so, please use a tissue and kind remove yourself from the room.

This last one is a wink to all of those poor souls like moi who take the train or other forms of public transportation.

Why do I ALWAYS get stuck next to Mr #6 ?

Heather R. said,

You’ll be please to know that I am training my kids to BACK THE HELL UP off people in public. Every time we are in a checkout line they have to span the whole damn thing. The people behind us are trying to put stuff on the belt and my ADHD kids heads are bobbing in the way. I just say PERSONAL SPACE and they mosey their little butts to the bagging area and way from the other customers.

You’re welcome, future shoppers.

Don’t get me started on drop in visitors. *Head Explodes*
Heather R. said,

*pleased

/ducks out
Lisa-MomDot said,

Great list , I agree with drop ins. I hate when people just show up. It seems that everyone shows up here when my baby is nappin and I would like to have one too!
Amanda said,

The only pop in visitor I can stand is my dad. He’ll wake up in the morning and decide to take a road trip and then call me and ask “What are you doing?” and he’ll be sitting in my driveway. But he also doesn’t expect me or my house to look perfect.
Harriet said,

You’ve got some of the same pent up grievances that I do. What’s with those people who crowd you in line? I purposely take my time in moving when that happens.
Maria@Conversations with Moms said,

I love this this. I totally get the drop-ins. I wrote a post about it too

http://conversationswithmoms.com/2009/01/19/surprise-visitors-are-they-really-welcome/

I don’t get why some people think it’s o.k to to that.
Staci A said,

I’m so with you on #3. My hubby always asks people to see something upstairs and I hate it. There’s always laundry on the floor or some other mess to be hidden up there! Drives me nuts!
Heather R. said,

Another idea! When the #2s and the #5s pull their crap YOU should turn into #6!!!!
Miss Behavin said,

I am one who also doesn’t appreciate drop in company. I like to know when someone is coming over…and I need more than 5 minutes notice.
Denise said,

Ha – no hacking zone! So funny! My hubby does that in the morning…makes me GAG!
Toni @ The Mud Bug said,

I have to laugh at number #5 because I so hate when people do that.
Kathy said,

Drop ins don’t bother me if standing at the door doesn’t bother them…I have 5 kids, my house is lived in and sometimes not as neat as I would like for it to be, especailly to someone other than family… I can’t believe I didn’t think of #3 for my list…AGREE!!
Mr. Shelby said,

Great post, as always! LOVE this list.

I despise drop-ins. WTF are those people thinking. And don’t get me started on invading my personal space.

-Mr. Shelby
Nina said,

Oh. My. God. I could have written this post. Like in the same order, and everything. Only, I don’t have a cubicle. I work in an operating room, so it’s possible I’m even a little more germaphobic. That’s hysterical.
Karen of Sillymonkeez said,

I totally agree with #1 and #3. Some people just don’t know the meaning of the word “privacy.”
Amanda said,

I hate when people stand so close to me in lines. I scoot up and then they scoot up. I want to smack them, LOL.